April 06, 2008
The 4C's Acronyms
4C's is always so much fun. The locations are usually great, and I get to see people that I wouldn't see otherwise, which is a definite perk. But this year, New Orleans added a new element to the usual thrill. From the time T and I started our journey to The Big Easy, we were inundated with non-stop blog material. I don't even know how I can relate all of the experiences we had, but I think a bulleted list might help me communicate the high points of our adventure, so here goes:
1. CWF (Crazy White Female). One middle aged woman thought she had the right to ask T to unplug her computer in the Atlanta airport (our layover spot). "How long will you be using this outlet"? WHAT? The best was when I took it upon myself to point out where the other AVAILABLE outlets were, and THEN she said "I'm not gonna walk over there to use those". Then Bitch, you must not need an outlet.
OH NO SHE DIDN'T! Now, let me just say that I will always be a "round the way girl". You can wallpaper my home with degrees, and I will always be ready to kick somebody's ass-period. Especially when faced with overt racism, classism, and persons that exhibit this type of entitlement. This lady took me back to a time in my life where only whipping your ass would have made me happy. Thank God for T, because I can't say that I would not have responded like 'back in the day' had she not been there to hold me back. Then the bitch had an attitude and walked away like she was wronged! Hell to the NO.
2. TLD (The Lap Dance). I don't know what it is about T, but no matter the state, time of day, or location, she always manages to get unsolicited lap dances!
The funniest thing about this is that when we sat down at this particular bar on Bourbon Street, we were sitting on very high stools, and the first thing I said to her was "You'll be safe from any lap dances here!" Apparently not. At least this lap dance came with a marriage proposal.
3. THG (The Hand Grenade). The best drink I have ever had. It took me about 8 hours to drink it all.
I would have finished sooner, but I didn't want to show up at my caucus meeting jacked up! That would have been inappropriate, SI?
4. BS (Bourbon Street). The BOMB. What else can be said about a street encompassed by music, history, culture, happy drunk fools, and drink kiosks?
Did you know that Bourbon Street is the only street in the states where it is NOT illegal to have open drinks outside of drinking establishments? And the architecture isn't too shabby either.
5. TR (The Riverwalk)The Riverwalk was great. It houses over 140 shops, and some delicious gumbo that can be enjoyed al fresco while you look at the river.
The gumbo was almost as good as the fried dough. Yeah, I know it's got a fancy French name, but here it's called pizza frite, and in my old neighborhood, they are called zeppoles; bottom line-it's fried dough cover in powdered sugar, and it is DELICIOUS!.
6. ACD (Awesome Cab Driver). On our way back from Bourbon Street, T and I were lucky enough to have a cab driver that gave us a history lesson on New Orleans. For example, New Orleans is home to the largest cathedral in the states.
And, he was so sweet, that after telling us as much history as he could fit into that short cab ride, he asked me what I was bringing home to my daughters, then he proceeded to give me the beads that he had around his rear view mirror for M.
7. N&D (Nickeled and Dimed). The Hilton is no joke. Not only do they want to charge $200 a night to stay there, but they also expect you to pay $15 a day for internet service, and $10 a day to go to the health club. The hotel is gorgeous, but damn. And of course, there was the $20 breakfast buffet.
And they wonder why grad students have to be food hoes.
8. G, W&R (Gumbo, Weather and Restaurants). The two reasons I was so excited to get to New Orleans was to eat Gumbo and bask in the sunshine. Both lived up to my expectations. The gumbo was great everywhere and the weather was so warm I was sorry to come back to Syracuse. The Palace and Houston's were both terrific places eat, although I was surprised to get my first bowl of gumbo in a tin cup! The Palace had a jazz band playing while we ate, and it added a wonderful element of authenticity to the place.
It was great to be in a place where there is such an obvious element of culture everywhere you go. I can't wait to go back for pleasure! And of course, being there just validated my desire to move South.
These are just the most memorable moments; there were many funny moments that I probably will recall after this entry is published, and some that are just best kept off the blogosphere. Either way, the trip was great, and I hope I get to see San Francisco next year!
Posted by dvaldesd at 01:50 PM | Comments (1)
February 21, 2008
Piano Freak
This is what Marina calls me-because she says I'm obsessed with the piano (which I am). The other two are much kinder about it;they just play songs for me they know I will love, because I am, well, a piano freak.
This song has been out for a while, but I swear when I heard it I felt like I was part of the music. It's funny that we seldom hear about the rhetoric of music. Now that's a project! The cultural rhetoric of music. Yep, it's piano lessons for me...sooner than most folks think.
The artist is Stacey Orrico
Posted by dvaldesd at 03:38 PM | Comments (0)
January 30, 2008
Truly a Universal Language...
Sometimes, music says it better than words ever can...
Posted by dvaldesd at 10:22 PM | Comments (2)
January 19, 2008
The eventual goal of love is...
not the exciting, heat raising experience that we all wish we could hang on to forever (unless you plan to take Dopamine pills for the rest of your life!), but instead, according to this week's Time Magazine, the goal is "to move beyond the early thrill of love and into the comfort of the Sunday-paper-and-coffee phase".
While the scope of the article is to explain the why(s) and wherefore(s) concerning the importance of love and mating, I was comforted to see that my desire for stability is more common than I thought. Don't get me wrong-I never want to be part of the "old fuddy club". In fact, those closest to me know that I am all about keeping the heat in the relationship alive and well. But, I do believe that the type of stability spoken of in the article is romantic and valuable in its own way; it's built on mutual respect, love, memories (of the wild times), and all of the secrets and private jokes that the couple share.
And then there's the quiz. Yep. A quiz-titled "The Thermometer of Love". Its focus is to assess the different temperatures of love; cool, hot, and scalding. The scores range from 15 to a maximum of 135. I scored a 115, thank you very much! The number/score reflects the heat of your emotions when you felt most passionately about the person in question. If you're currently single, then in order to take the quiz you have to be willing to muster up those old feelings you had for a certain someone. Fret not, the quiz is fun to take, and what have you got to lose? You might learn something about yourself that you didn't know. Good luck!
According to this article...
"If partners are going to stay together, they need a love that bonds them to each other without the distraction of passion. That's not to say that people can't stay in love, or that those couples who say they still feel romantic are imagining things. These people, however, are the exceptions, and nearly all relationships must settle and cool. Long for the heat of early love if you want, but you'd have to pay for it with the solidity you've built over the years. 'You've got to make a transition to a stabler state' says Barry McCarthy, a psychologist and sex therapist. If love can be mundane, that's because sometimes it's meant to be".
And, of course, it will only be as mundane as you both want it to be, right?
Posted by dvaldesd at 06:48 PM | Comments (0)
January 17, 2008
The Secret Life Of...
Lately, I have been pondering the idea of having a journal. Since I love to write, I thought a journal would make for the perfect place to express my feelings, new ideas, and overall mushy gushy wishes that I often am too embarrassed to express outwardly. Here is my dilemma- as much as I love the romantic idea of sitting in my room late at night composing whatever comes to mind, I do not want to create a notebook of my most intimate thoughts on paper. I really just want to create it for myself. Now, this is interesting because two of my daughters have been keeping journals/diaries since they were little, and of course I was the one that encouraged this endeavor. At one point, M. and I shared a notebook where we would write to each other, back when I was burning the candle at both ends (working full time and taking 18 credits at Utica College). To date, I cannot remember how many empty pages I have provided for them, and in fact, I still do. What I haven't yet figured out is if creating an anonymous online journal will give me the same satisfaction as treating myself to a prohibitively expensive leather bound journal, lighting some candles at the end of the night, igniting some Nag Champa, and writing in longhand.
Sometimes I think the old fashioned way is the way to go-after all, I am a hopeless romantic. Then again, creating a mysterious blog/journal would be like sending (God knows how) many people a virtual message in a bottle. Stay tuned.
Posted by dvaldesd at 08:53 PM | Comments (2)
October 31, 2007
Mommy Medicine
Here's the thing-anyone that only considers the romantic side of motherhood should really think about the lifetime commitment we (women!) make when we decide to be GOOD mothers. Case in point-I had to drop everything today and rush to pick Amanda up from school, because she was diagnosed with pneumonia. To say that I was terrified doesn't cover it. I was so upset that my angel was sick, I ran out of the house with barely enough money to pay the toll! I'm just happy she's home for the next few days. There's nothing like Mommy love to cure what ails you...at any age.
I remember the first 2 times I was in labor...I wanted my Mom! Of course, by the third pregnancy I was smart enough to have her in the room with me, and she even got to cut Marina's umbilical cord.
Posted by dvaldesd at 08:30 PM | Comments (0)
October 01, 2007
It's the small things...
For years I have lived with a sub-standard, crappy dining table and mismatched chairs. After daydreaming about how nice it might be to own a completely new, matching, un-masticated (see below) dining room set, my time has finally arrived. Now I can actually have guests and offer them a nice place to sit, sip coffee, or just chat. Who knew that purchasing the dinette set of your dreams could be so exciting?
I used to have a beautiful wooden table with matching chairs, about 8 years ago. I also has 2 Rots at the time. Although they were the sweetest dogs ever, they loved the taste of wood. Once that dinette was destroyed, I settled for one of those cheap, $100 dollar metal/wire tables, with the green matching chairs. The chairs fell apart one by one. Enough said.
Posted by dvaldesd at 01:02 PM | Comments (2)
August 23, 2007
I'm ready...
I am finally done with all my remaining projects! Of course, I am ecstatic. Now I get to concentrate on my research, and I have to say that makes me unbelievably happy. It has been a very long journey for me. I have lost loved ones, gotten divorced, dealt with single motherhood, and watched my girls grow up to be amazing young women. I have learned so many wonderful things, and I guess the best part is the realization that in many ways, the learning is also just beginning. I have joked before on here about the enormous responsibility of reading for exams, and how I am generally a terrible test taker, but there is something about acquiring immense amounts of knowledge that makes me feel peaceful about it. Oh, don't get me wrong- I know I will probably want to throw-up the day of the exam(s), but I can't help but wonder if the test anxiety I always feel will be somewhat different this time around. There has got to be comfort in knowing that you have digested 150 or so books prior to that fateful day. And, I get to defend anything that might have been misunderstood or not clearly expressed. I don't know. But I am eager to find out!
The only thing that I do find really daunting is the creation of a monster works cited list! I have purchased Endnote X, and I am hoping that it is all that is promises to be. If not, maybe they'll just lend me a typist.
Oh, yeah, like I said in the title...I'M READY!
Posted by dvaldesd at 08:29 PM | Comments (1)
I'm ready...
I am finally done with all my remaining projects! Of course, I am ecstatic. Now I get to concentrate on my research, and I have to say that makes me unbelievably happy. It has been a very long journey for me. I have lost loved ones, gotten divorced, dealt with single motherhood, and watched my girls grow up to be amazing young women. I have learned so many wonderful things, and I guess the best part is the realization that in many ways, the learning is also just beginning. I have joked before on here about the enormous responsibility of reading for exams, and how I am generally a terrible test taker, but there is something about acquiring immense amounts of knowledge that makes me feel peaceful about it. Oh, don't get me wrong- I know I will probably want to throw-up the day of the exam(s), but I can't help but wonder if the test anxiety I always feel will be somewhat different this time around. There has got to be comfort in knowing that you have digested 150 or so books prior to that fateful day. And, I get to defend anything that might have been misunderstood or not clearly expressed. I don't know. But I am eager to find out!
The only thing that I do find really daunting is the creation of a monster works cited list! I have purchased Endnote X, and I am hoping that it is all that is promises to be. If not, maybe they'll just lend me a typist.
Oh, yeah, like I said in the title...I'M READY!
Posted by dvaldesd at 08:29 PM | Comments (1)
July 26, 2007
Latinas avoid college because they are fat?
The fact that Latino/as have the highest drop rate in the states in not new, but to discover that Latinas want to avoid college because of their weight is astounding to me.
Wow. I have three daughters, and only one of them is overweight. It took me years to deprogram her into believing that there is nothing wrong with wearing a size 14-I know plenty of men that like women with meat on their bones. Here is the irony of this situation-education is a priority for me, so I made it a point to live in a one of the best school districts in the country. The only problem is (you guessed it!) that it is a predominantly white school district filled with young women who would rather starve than buy stretch jeans (and boys who only want to date skinny girls). So, while my daughter was getting the best education I could provide her with, the price was high. It wasn't until my mother suggested a trip to Puerto Rico that it occurred to me that once she saw how WE define beauty, she would realize that the problem had more to do with ethnocentricity than obesity. I am happy to report that she returned from Puerto Rico scantily clad and proud to be who she was, but what if my mom had not taken her on that trip? How would I have ended the dangerous cycle of depression that she was experiencing prior to that trip? I don't know what I would have done.
The sad part is that it is a lose-lose situation. Education vs. Self-Esteem. If we want to go to the best schools, that usually means that we are not around our own people, unless we reside on our homeland. If we want to surround ourselves with our familiars, then that means we will most likely not be going to the best schools possible. What do we do? To assume that schools will amend their curriculum to include teaching self-esteem to a particular ethnic group is a great hope, but alas unrealistic. If we can't even get new textbooks for many our Latino/a students, how do we begin to actually effect any change regarding this issue?
The fact that it has become so important to join the (ab)norm distresses me, because it means that our culture is being forever impacted by another culture's standards...is that one of the tenets of colonialization?
Posted by dvaldesd at 04:54 PM | Comments (3)
July 16, 2007
I haven't disappeared...
I've just been very busy. I have been trying to finish up my final project (which is now a month late), thinking about exams lists & proposals, and trying to finish any work that needs to be done before exam time actually comes. Believe it or not, I spend upwards of 6 hours a day writing (maternal responsibilities and doctors appointments permitting), and I still have about 7 pages to go. The problem is that this paper is related to my research, and I would like to it become a chapter in my diss; and this is what dissertation writing must be like. I know that it seems far off, but I know that it is around the corner, and that intimidates me. I have come to the realization that dissertations are very personal products; they symbolize all of our hard work, frustrations, neglected relationships, and other self imposed abuses along with hours of lonely solitude. And, despite the romanticism of it all, we all want to write something that contributes to the conversation of our choice and reflects our knowledge and hard work. We want to be proud of the work we've done, and we deserve to be; the trick is going to be to do it in the alloted time. I can already imagine the scores of phone calls I will be making to my friends, colleagues, mentors and family members (not necessarily in that order).
So if you see my name come up on your caller I.D., please answer it! I will need you to remind me that the completion of this degree is not only for the fulfillment of my dreams, but also the dream of my parents & my daughters. I am going to need to hear that "I signed up for this cruise" willingly, and that I can indeed do it. And of course, I will need you to remind me that there are deadlines that can not be negotiated, and committee members that have invested their time and their trust in me. Will I want to hear all of that? Probably not, but the people that we count on are supposed to tell us what we need to hear and not what we want to hear, right? In the end, you all know I will be grateful, and will finally be able to afford to take you out to dinner..once I get a job, of course!
For those of you whose number I don't have, feel free to e-mail it to me. I will be happy to add you to my emergency list!
But I guess for all my musings the one thing I better do is get back to writing the paper that will serve as the entry way to all that I have to look forward to...
Posted by dvaldesd at 06:10 PM | Comments (1)
July 07, 2007
something new...
Well, I finally talked my partner into creating a blog. While he is not Boricua, he is a person of color with many valuable insights on what we all experience on a day to day basis. Add him to your blog roll-you won't be disappointed. The man has got his shit together, and often gives me a run for my money with regard to insightful intellectual thought. Welcome to the world of bloggers, sweetheart!
Posted by dvaldesd at 12:18 AM | Comments (0)
June 25, 2007
Graduation Day & More...
Yesterday, daughter number 2 made her way to the stage to get her diploma, and I have to say it was great to see her march across the stage with a Kool-aid smile on her face. The ceremony was just short of 2 hours, but the time went quickly. The speeches weren't dull, and the students speaking were as articulate as I expected they would be, given that this school district is #153 in the country.
But while the pride I felt at being blessed with such good kids was evidenced by the smile on my face, I was very proud of all the students. Even though it was a day to celebrate the beginning of the rest of their lives, they lovingly paid tribute to their peer, a young lady who lost her life in a car accident weeks before graduation. In a touching show of genuine kindness, the students decided that they would have green bracelets made (her favorite color) with her initials and her favorite saying "Choose to be happy". All 232 students wore their bracelets in her honor, and the class president gifted all school administrators on stage with bracelets of their own (which was especially meaningful since ordinarily they use this opportunity to give the principal a "gag" gift). The ceremony closed with her family walking across the stage on her behalf, receiving her diploma.
To say that this was a moment that none of us will ever forget is an understatement. While we must learn to let our children go forth in the world, it is events like this one that make you appreciate every moment you have with them, and every milestone they achieve.
Congratulations, Amanda. I am so proud of you!
Posted by dvaldesd at 04:59 PM | Comments (2)
June 18, 2007
Homage to my Dad
There are some things that just bring a tear to my eye, and observing Dad's with their daughters is often one of them. While at the movies tonight a dad walked into the theater with his daughter and it reminded me of when my dad and I used to go to the movies (which was almost every weekend!). They were so sweet together! They conjured up memories of all of the wonderful time me & my Dad spent together, and all of the memories we made.
Thank you Dad, for all that you taught me and for not being the typical absentee Dad that can't be bothered with his child post-divorce. Thank you for never missing a weekend and giving me away on my wedding day. Thank you for always lending an ear when I needed it, and always being on my side. And, of course, thank you for the good looks!
Happy Father's Day, Daddy. This is the 11th year that you have not been here for me to tell you how glad I am that you are my dad, but I trust that you know how much I love you. I miss you more than you can imagine.
Posted by dvaldesd at 12:57 AM | Comments (0)
January 25, 2007
For The Non-Spanglish Speaker...
Courtesy of CasaCub.org...
Cuban Dictionary
Translations:
English to Spanish, & back to English
Bosguagon n. the Volkswagen Beetle
He's got a crush.
El tiene un coco.
"He's got a coconut."
He's confused.
El tiene los cables cruza'os.
"His cables are crossed."
That rocks!
!Boto la casa por la ventana!
"He threw the house out the window!"
He's a pretty boy.
Es una postalita.
"He's a postcard."
It's a big problem.
Eso ni lo brinca un chivo.
"Not even a goat can jump it".
He takes good care of himself.
Se da lija.
"He sandpapers himself."
He died.
Canto el manicero.
"He sang the peanut vendor."
She's cute.
Que mona.
"She's a monkey."
He's a good guy.
Es un pan.
"He's a piece of bread."
He plays dumb.
Se hace la mosquita muerta.
"He plays the dead fly."
He's trouble.
Es la pata 'el diablo.
"He's the leg of the devil."
Come in, come in and have a seat.
Entre, entre y tome una silla.
"Between, between and drink a chair."
Just in case.
Por si las moscas.
"For if the flies."
I overdid it.
Se me fue la mano.
"My hand left me."
I'm going to slap you.
Te voy a entrar a galleta limpia
"I'm gonna enter you to clean crackers."
He's spreading a rumor.
Esta corriendo la bola.
"He's running the ball."
Links
marque n. a supermarket
groceri n. grocery store or supermarket
Articles / Articúlos
Guendis n. Wendy's fast-food restaurant
Berguerquin n. Burger King
Macdonal n. McDonnald's
Pisa Ho n. Pizza Hut
Sebenileben n. 7-Eleven convenience store
guarejaus n. warehouse
pisicorre n. station wagon
paraguero n. inept motorist
saguecera n. Miami's southwest residential areas
jandi n. a parking space reserved for the handicapped
tique n. ticket
transporteichon n. barely adequate automobile
La Vaquita n. the closest Farm Stores to your house
dauntaun n. urban downtown area
llompear v. the act of connecting two vehicles' power sources together with jumper cables in order to induce recharging of one of the vehicle's batteries
un su n. a legal suit
yin n. a pair of jeans
blumer n. women's underwear; panties
pantijo n. panty hose
tenis n. athletic shoes; sneakers
chor n. pair of shorts
yaqui n. a jacket or windbreaker
Guachinton n. Washington D.C.
Mallamibish n. Miami Beach
printear v. to print; use of a computer printer
faxear v. to fax
taipear v. to type
incontas adj. Income Tax
bisne n. a business or business endeavor
escochteip n. Scotch Tape
liquiando v. a leak
efichiensi n. efficiency housing
Fa n. Fab laundry detergent
lonchando v. having lunch
cachú n. tomato ketchup
quaquer n. Quaker Oats brand cereal
quei n. a cake
pitipua n. green peas
jambergue n. a hamburger
beico n. bacon
shicle n. chewing gum
cuqui n. a cookie
jotdo n. a frankfurter
sanguishe n. a sandwich
estop n. stop sign
guau adj. wow
un chou v. to make a scene in public
japiverdei n. a birthday
embarkation n. failure to adhere to a previous commitment or
agreement
flonquear v. to fail an examination or course
Tricotri n. Halloween
meri crisma merry christmas
japi nu yier happy new year
Now you know why we say that some things are:
1) NON-TRANSFERRABLE &
2) WHY YOU ALWAYS LOSE SOMETHING IN THE TRANSLATION.
Posted by dvaldesd at 12:14 PM | Comments (0)
August 01, 2006
Hazy, Lazy Days of Summer
Yep. That's me. LAZY. Although I'm not certain that the heat is responsible. The truth is that I am just mentally tired. Having been in school for a consecutive 8 years, I think my brain is tired. So, what happened to that reading I was so eager to do? Well, I am trying to get through it, but I have to say it's tough. My brain seems to be shut off. Of course, that only spells more work for me in the long run, and I know that-yet I am stuck in this perpetual state of mental numbness. I don't know what to do about it. I have tried changing my work schedule, piece-mealing it, and reading one day on and then one day off. Nothing seems to work. So, now I just feel like an irresponsible student that does not deserve the luxury of laziness, because I have so much invested in my work (and I truly do love it), and so far to go. Not to mention the guilt associated with disappointing those that have taken on the responsibility of working with me. Maybe the guilt will seep in deeply enough to get me in gear. Any and all suggestions are welcome...
Posted by dvaldesd at 04:09 PM | Comments (0)
July 04, 2006
Independence Day
Happy 4th Y'all! Yeah, it's been a while since I've posted, but I've had a lot going on. I taught summer session one (as you know if you've been checking in now and again), and I have to say that while I thought it was going to be just like the regular semester, it was both a rewarding and a learning experience. I can tell you that while the course is intense because of the six week schedule, it also gives you an opportunity to get on top of your game. There is no fluff time in the summer. You have 6 weeks to teach 15 weeks worth of knowledge, and I think that I will be the better teacher for it. This kind of schedule demands organization, instant cohesiveness with regard to assignments (since there really isn’t any time to let them 'get it' on their own), and creativity because the students are already less than thrilled to be there. Now that it’s over I feel like I have so much that I want to do in the upcoming semesters.
Than there is the matter of the personal... Since my birthday in May, one relationship has ended, and a brand new romance has begun. Of course, there is always sadness when a relationship that you've invested a significant amount of time in doesn't work out, but I have to say that I am happier now than I have been in a really long time-not to mention excited to see what develops! No pics yet of the new man worth posting, but I am hoping that he will be around long enough for me to take one of us and post it.
Then, there is the matter of my independent study which has just gotten underway. I have been looking forward to these readings since last semester , so I expect to be quite busy trying to negotiate all of the theory I have had questions about since my journey in CCR began. So that's what's been up with me, and it's only July! I can't wait to see what the next 6 weeks brings. Caio...
Posted by dvaldesd at 04:04 PM | Comments (0)